How do you teach yourself to forgive? While it may be quite tough to forgive others for what they did and did not do, it is nothing compared to how difficult it is to forgive yourself. But the secret to living a better life is to learn to forgive yourself for feeling guilt over past mistakes. That’s the only way you can truly move on.
Forgive yourself. It is one of the easiest things to say, but so much harder to do. People can mess up sometimes, and it could lead to destructive behaviors. While you may be overwhelmed with feelings of guilt, shame, and humiliation, you need to learn to forgive yourself.
Experts believe that if such negative feelings are not dealt with accordingly, they could make you suffer from unwanted mental and physical diseases like depression, anxiety, and heart disease.
None of which truly leads to a happy life.
What is guilt? It is the feeling that bothers you from the inside. It is a constant reminder of the past mistakes causing anxiety. Is it possible to get over the guilt and feel happy again?
Learning to forgive yourself will help you feel less hurt and experience less anger too. Getting over the guilt is all about feeling less stressed about not getting things entirely right, but feeling happy about getting it done.
Forgiving yourself is all about freeing yourself from stress. You are less likely to suffer from muscle tension, headaches, dizziness, and upset stomach when you let go. In addition, people who have learned to forgive themselves for their past mistakes have experienced a significant improvement in their lives.
Their appetite, sleep patterns, and energy levels are so much better.
If you want to improve your life, make sure to consider doing any of these:
When it comes to the facts of the past, they become deadly when you keep it in silence. Stop pretending that it never happened and start facing the reality that you are just holding it all in. Release it and feel free. Express how you feel. Talk to a trusted person about it. It could be your mentor, friend, or professional counselor. Forgiveness begins when you become honest about yourself and embrace vulnerability about who you really are.
Whether it is the good or bad side of you, it is a part of who you are.
Pretending that it never happened will not make it go away. In truth, it will only make things worse. Break out of the ties of denial and be honest about how messed up you are. Face the consequences of your actions and behavior.
If you can, write about what is making you feel angsty. The actions you took in the past does not define who you are. There’s always something you can do to correct it.
Nobody is perfect. Striving for perfection will only make you feel worse. An imperfect person like you will make mistakes in life, and that’s the truth.
There will be times when your actions will not meet other people’s expectations of you. Your actions may hurt people sometimes, and you might regret what you did.
Whether it is riddled with guilt or shame, you will have to accept that there will be times when you can do things that others won’t like. Let go of the thought of perfection and simply accept reality.
This acceptance is critical in growing your emotional health.
Holding on to your guilt will not help you at all. Justifying your past actions just to prove that you are right is not going to be helpful at all.
Forgiving yourself is a choice that you have to make. When you choose to stop hating yourself for your past actions or choose to apologize for the hurt you may have caused other people, that’s your call.
How you see yourself in relation to others is what will set your expectations of the world. Are these expectations healthy? Are they unrealistic? When you find it very difficult to measure up to your expectations, perhaps you have set the bar too high.
The secret to finding happiness is to tweak your perspective about life a little bit. Healthy expectations are achievable, and they leave you with a sense of fulfillment. Unrealistic ones are those that drain you of energy and leave you feeling overwhelmed.
All too often, people punish themselves for the bad things they did in the past. They push themselves to make up for the “wrong” they have done. They call themselves losers for not getting it right the first time.
And although not everyone openly talks about how they feel, they are secretly suffering. The negative emotions overpower them, and it eats up the best in them. It strips them off joy and satisfaction about life.
The hardest person to learn to forgive is yourself. It is hard to teach yourself how to let go of guilt. It is not the friend who backstabbed you or the mother who wasn’t really there for you. It is not even the ex-boyfriend who left you brokenhearted.
Why is the most difficult person to forgive yourself? Because you know that you can always do better, but you didn’t. You have to live with that every day. That’s not so hard to figure out.
Forgiving yourself is tough, but it is not impossible to do. With these five tips, you can surely find it in you to expect less, give more, and simply change for the better.
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